I want a comfortable house in a city that I love, with a fenced in backyard and a dog named Sam, or Duke, or Buddy. I want a husband and a cute little girl with blonde hair and a perfect mix of mine and his’ faces. I want her to always be laughing. I want a career that gives me purpose, a job that fills me everyday. I want to be settled in this life. I want a Subaru…you know, the sporty looking station wagon kind; forest green with a simple beige interior, and a bike rack. Everybody needs a bike rack.

I want.

I want stability, a clear path, a known future.

I want the house to be white, somewhere on the North-Eastern coast. I want to learn how to sail. I want to go on runs with my golden retriever in the morning, swim in the ocean in the late afternoon, sit on my porch and watch the stars at night.

Every once in a while, I want to go somewhere and see something new. Scuba diving in Thailand or Bali, work with orphans in India, spend a week exploring Glaciers in Chile. Every once in a while, I want to be shaken. And then I want to come back home.

I want.

I want to believe in my own future. I want to believe that my goals are real, that my dreams aren’t just dreams. I’ve dreamt of a lot of things… but these things I’ve just mentioned, petty things like cars and homes, real things like family and purpose, they are all things that I want.

But, what do I need?

 

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